AM NOT A GIRL, NOT YET A WOMAN…

This song has caught my fancy of late. I hum it day and night. Probably coz it matches my state. But I might be older in terms of absolute age, but I see myself as a girl many a times. Probably I am not tht old yet after all !!! Whtever the parameters, I feel young, and vulnerable. And I believe its got to do with this lingering state of affairs in my life. I need time to sort it all out…….and there is a time for everything. Things wont happen before tht.
Nobody knows wht catches once fancy and when. Its true for everything, living and non living. Ha its true or people also. At least I feel so. Sometimes u feel a sudden nd unexplained aversion for some ppl, and try as u may even u cannot justify it in ur head. A classic example cld be, I literally worship Mr.A, but his wife somehow does not catch my fancy. Shez an amazing woman though…….u hardly come across a lady so smart, and shez perfect in her dealings, and I like her when I talk to her, she fits my bill of wht a woman of today sdh be like perfectly……….yet when alone …………
It cld be tht since I don’t have much of a dealing with her, maybe if I interact more with her things may change.
It ws so with N too, I liked her to begin with, then she said a silly thing, and I ws pissed off completely, and literally started despising her, till we started interacting and I found wht an amazing person she is.
And it can be other way round too…… ! Some ppl appear so charming the first time around, and later you realize tht its not their true face.
Ah, life is deception. And need not crib abt wht went wrong, cheer abt wht u did right.
Mr.A today gave three Elixirs of Life
1. dil pe mat le yaar
2. just do it
3. ye dil should not mange more
Strange as they sound, they kind of ring a bell. The third one is probably most controvercial, s let me explain. It simply means tht we shd not have unrealistin expectations of urselves, leta keep ur feet planted firmly on the ground. Smth, which I am really bad at.
I don’t know wht the CAT’s result may turn out to be, but my training under this person will surely give me some legacy to carry forth.
And coming back to Britney Spears……..well this song does reflect my state of mind…..subtely, simply and beautifully. And why just me, probably every girl my age.